Dating someone younger than you high school

20 Apr

Why do you need to demand so much of the person and the relationship so early on? Isn’t this all a bit like an elaborate prank that goes way too far?

But for those of you who get swept up in someone’s tide, you can enjoy yourself but it’s time you became aware of red flags, boundaries, and matching actions with words.

The relationships that survive (healthily) are ones where the two people have slowed down but are in essence still the same two people that met and there isn’t a dramatic shift in character and integrity.

Being confident in yourself is also about believing that there isn’t a fire – you can take enough time to get to know each other without rushing to get your pants down and make big declarations. People who tend to fast-forward can go through their cycle in a few hours (ever met an intense person online who sent you several emails, pestered you and then disappeared?

When the relationship stops being new, they’re panicking about what you may be expecting, and they’re sure of your interest, the desire loses its ‘erection’.

If you don’t hear from them again, they’ll have moved on and pressed The Reset Button with someone else…and lather, rinse, repeat.

Also don’t you remove the mystery and stuff to look forward to when you try to do it all very quickly? If you are being fast-forwarded you will miss crucial red flags that indicate that the relationship is unhealthy.

It’s crucial to remember that dating is a discovery period.They either disappear when they start to feel panicky about the fact that you will want, need, and expect in line with the great show they have been putting on.Or…they just revert to the ‘real them’, ripping the rug from under your feet and replacing hot with cold and someone who you barely recognise. People who engage in Fast-Forwarding are Future Fakers, whether they directly do it by talking up a storm about plans or do it indirectly by behaving so intensely and putting so many demands on you (emotional, sexual, wanting to be with you all the time), that they let you believe that the level of intensity you are experiencing is what is on offer.If these people are still around in a year or two and your high intensity dalliance yields into something more steady, then good for you.However, the problem with people who fast-forward is that they can’t cope with steadiness.